Changes and Goodbyes

Well I'm back in Oklahoma now, stuff is moved in our house and now the task at hand is unpacking. Even though I was here last year much has changed. And I have found that I am one that (depending on what they are) is not the most fond of change. I'm learning what it's like to have roots down in more than one place, and how I need to strive to be intentional with the people I come across and then have the pain of leaving them once I move. I'm someone who needs people (let's be honest: we all do) and I get attached easily so it's hard to say goodbye. As much as goodbyes and changes are uncomfortable I feel they are going to be a part of my life for some time. I feel called to ministry and to take oppurtunites that God puts in my path. At this point in time I don't quite know what that looks like, could be the mission field overseas, a stateside ministry or just joining my spouse in the minstry God is calling us to. With any of these there could be change, but what I'm pumped about is that as much as change and goodbyes are hard to adjust to God's strength works best in my weaknesses! I love that! Also, I can do all things through Christ so even when the calling seems hard and unreachable it is possible because of Jesus! I'm entering my second and last year of Bible school, with this I find myself excited about the oppurtunites that I am going to get to walk in after this school year. Again, I have no idea what they will be but I'm confident that God will show me in His perfect timing. The question isn't if I'm called, but more so where to. The unknown is exciting and yet a little nerve wrecking at the same time :) but I don't have to fear, just walk in obedience and then I will be walking right into what God has for me. 
One of my friends always talks about being intentional, and I think God taught me this summer what that really looks like. It also became on of the reasons it made it hard to leave again, new relationships were started and old ones were strengthened. Now, it's time to uplift roots for a little while and be intentional in good ole Broken Arrow Oklahoma. I don't want to waste any time or oppurtunity that God gives me here. I think I finally get that now :) We always talk about loving God and loving people and it's time to put that into action. I know how much in my own life I crave relationships with people, God made us that way, so I want to be a tool that God uses in someone elses life. (haha side note: sitting in a restaurant and this little boy keeps leaving his mom to come stand by me and smile. :) adorable kid lol) So let's not forget that two are better than one, we are here for purpose and a lot of that purpose if not all of it has to do with people :)

 ⁹ Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. ¹⁰ If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. ¹¹ Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? ¹² A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken." Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Kind of a random post but it was what has been going on in my head these past few days :)

When I got to tulsa yesterday I was feeling a plethera of emotions and a bit overwhelmed, then I saw the rays shining down from these clouds and just felt peace come over me. God was reminding me that He is near :)

Multiplier of Love

The other day when I was washing my hair I had the radio on and the song "Whatever You're doing" by Sanctus Real was playing. The chorus says "Whatever You're dong inside of me/ It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace/ It's hard to surrender to what I can't see/ but I'm giving in to something Heavenly"  which I love, then the end of the song picks up and the lyrics are "Whatever You're doing inside of me/ It feels like chaos but now I can see/ You're up to something bigger than me/ Larger than life, something Heavenly" About this time I was squirting conditioner in my hand, and the conditioner now in my hand came out in the shape of a heart which I thought was cool, with my next few squirts of conditioner I figured it would mess the heart up, but no....the heart just got bigger! I felt God was saying "See Kayla, I'm always a muliplier of love"  And even though sometimes whatever is going on in me seems like chaos and I don't quite understand, I don't have to fear because God is Love, and His perfect love is casting out all fear. The result will  be good  because my God is a  multipliier of love and He's up to something bigger than me! :) Just when I thought the conditioner heart would mess up, He multiplied it, that's quite applicable for me today. When I"m at a point where I think things are messy, He makes beauty out of it. :)

"And we know (understand, recognize, are conscious of, by observation and by experience) and believe (adhere to and put faith in and rely on) the love God cherishes for us. God is love, and he who dwells and continues in love dwells and continues in God, and God dwells and continues in him." 1 John 4:16 amplified

-It's not the same heart God made the other day :)

Rise up and walk!

I love when God reminds us of something He told us in the past to help us in the now. I was having one of those days that I was allowing the past to come back up and hurt me, it made me feel like I was lacking, not good enough and simply broken. These thoughts brought me back to a hurt place that I was in the beginning of the summer, and I am not a fan of backsliding so praise God for Him pulling me back up! At one point in my day as I hung my head God simply said in my spirit "Rise up and walk daughter!" :) This is cool because in the beginning of the summer as I was going through a hurtful time I remember God tugging on my heart and saying "It doesn't matter if you missed it or if they missed it. You are not missing it now because you're walking in step with Me and I never miss it! I have you in the right place at the right time and you are going to get the right result! You are moving forward and it's your turn, it's your turn, it's your turn! To rise up and walk in what I have for you!" God was showing me that I couldn't walk in what He had for me if my face was to the floor in despair. And He reminded me of that again today- it doesn't matter what the circumstance looks like in the natural, God already promised the future to be good, He promised to never leave us and to never fail us. If we trust Him, there's no way we can lose! So let's stand up, so that we can walk in what our loving Father has set before us! He promised it to be good! Don't get tripped up in the traps that the enemy tries to put before you. My spiritual mentor reminded me today that satan may prowl around like a lion seeking whom he may devour but we cannot forget that Jesus already took his teeth and claws away! What kind of harm is a lion with no teeth and claws? It's roar may be frightening, it's size intimidating, it may even knock you down, but with no weapons it can't keep you there! The emotional hurt I was feeling today and the eye doctor report I received last week were just a loud roar from the enemy, haha but he can't hurt me! he is just trying to distract me to take my eyes off my King, and clothe me with fear, but no! he can't do what we won't allow him to do! God gave us victory over that sucker! So like my mentor said to me today "stand up and brush that junk off your back and get your eyes back on Jesus!" Rise up and walk!

" Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path." Proverbs 4:25-26